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KWENU! Our culture, our future |
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Wedlock Deadlock
Roland Bankole Marke Florida, USA
Saturday, May 5, 2007
A sluggish recital call to prayer blared from the loudspeakers of the village mosque at dawn, waking up Sabina from her sleep. She was too tired to get up. She reclined on a sleeping mat beneath her mother's bunk bed and dozed off again eerily. Usually, she would wake up first to begin the morning chores. Today, her mother is up already. Still half asleep, Sabina could hear her mother’s aching bones cracking amid the periodic quietness of the loudspeaker as she stretched out. Her mother’s name is Ajuah, a hefty-built woman with an imposing personality. She is a single parent, who toiled in her petty trading trying to make ends meet. While yawning, it seemed as if her jaws would not close up again. Her mouth opened wide for some time, only to close her jaws with a whisper that sounded like her name; A-a-a-j-j-j-u-u-u-a-a-a-h-h-h-h. It’s a scary sight to witness.
“Sabina! Sabina! Sabina!” There is no response. "Get up now! Right now!" She yelled, her voice rising. Ajuah decided to shake her daughter.
Surprisingly, for the first time, she was reluctant to get up from her sleeping mat. The sedating recital probably enticed her to wrap up tight in her skimpy cover. She continued a sweet snooze against her mother’s wish. Her mother had no clue that she had stayed up very late last night doing her homework. It was routine for her to wake up early to help with the petty trading that literally put food on their table.
Suddenly, Sabina felt sprinkles of cold water raining down on her. She jumped up from her sleeping mat screaming, "Hi... wai ... ooo ... Mama, the water too cold! Ee too cold! Cold rain water!" Sabina sucked her teeth unconsciously.
Ajuah held a cup of water in her grip and carelessly watched Sabina as she continued to laugh boisterously. "Stop dreaming, it is past time to get up and do your work,” she said.
Recovering from a half-drowsy state, Sabina got up, folded the mat and tucked it in the corner, where she would pick it up again at night.
Now fully conscious, Sabina briskly watered the plants and washed dirty pots and dishes. About six-thirty a.m., she was neatly dressed for school. She moved the baskets unaided to the "Poda-Poda"(1) stop, to avoid running late. She had never been late for school before. Dressed in her uniform, she carefully unloaded the baskets and doubled her strides to be able to arrive in school on time.
In a rude tone, the driver’s helper demanded that Ajuah must pay an extra fare for the vegetable baskets. She was agitated because of the helper’s disrespect, claiming she was also exploited in broad daylight in her homeland. She asked: “Why should I pay more money?”
“Mama you basket dae take extra place wae more pipul for tinap,”(2) he responded.
After the helper had jabbed back, she mumbled, saying she had to pay market stall dues too. “Life is a fine but complex flower bed,” she said loudly.
Sabina, now thirteen, was determined not to tread the same winding or rugged road that her mother struggled through daily. She began to accelerate a budding passion for education, working harder in chewing books that feed vibrant seeds to success and happiness. Hard work soon paid off: She won a scholarship to attend Annie Walsh, a reputable school in Freetown. She also got a distinction in the West African General Certificate of Education (GCE) Examination, capturing the best result in Sierra Leone. Her outstanding result made national and international news. She received several scholarship offers to enroll in reputable universities.
Sabina often pondered her humble beginnings. Her mother was central in her life, while her father Moses Strong had kept a distance. He surfaced when news of Sabina’s impressive educational success dawned. He was shamelessly proud of the enduring glory she showered the family. Often, he bragged that she got the genes from him. Sabina only gave a broad smile at his assertion. Her father’s real name was Alhaji Deensie-Cole. A Creole foster parent, Pa Strong, had raised him and his brother, changing their surname and social status. She loved her dad dearly like most girls, despite his carefree attitude and long absence during her upbringing.
Sabina Strong and Philip Coker-Davies met in secondary school. It was love at first sight; it made them sweethearts. They dated for several years and became a carbon copy of Romeo-and-Juliet story in its early stages. They were often seen holding hands together. In college their romance grew stronger and conspicuous. University students knew them as inseparable “love birds,” a name coined by close college friends. They took many classes together and usually sat close to each other.
Philip came from a family with a unique name associated with class and superiority. The Coker-Davies family was reputed for their insatiable drive for education. Most of their family members remained single, devoting their life to the quest for knowledge. They produced brilliant doctors and lawyers. Philip wanted to lead a balanced life and to raise a family. He was convinced that Sabina had the ideal makings to be his best choice and eventually become his soul mate. He seemed loving and down to earth, tall with side burns and extremely charming. He spoke well and had a kind heart. He loved making funny jokes, and he was witty, attentive, and intelligent. He saw the best in people rather than their flaws. Hooking up with Sabina seemed healthy and promising. From afar, they seemed like a sweet, happy couple.
Sabina, now twenty-six, was as pretty and innocent as Lady Diana in her prime. She was a brown-skinned, well-groomed, and well-dressed woman with demonstrated brilliance even at the university. She never nursed low self-esteem. Education was very important to her; it made up for her humble upbringing. Her infectious smiles wooed the hearts of people at first sight. She was soft-spoken and friendly. Her high moral values ranked her a first-class woman, who was devoted, faithful, and a treasure. Philip was the only man she ever dated.
A deep-rooted family interference soon began to creep into their promising relationship. Philip’s family nursed a feeling that Sabina was not good enough for him. Frankly, no one was good enough for Philip in his parents’ estimation. In addition, marriage was not at the top of their list of priorities. The parents had wit to discourage their children from getting married: a means adopted to discourage potential suitors or spouses seeking their children’s hand in wedlock. The “love birds” still lived with their parents, since it was taboo, according to common culture, to move in with an unmarried companion. Their relationship grew stronger despite the infrequent family intrusions. A deep mutual bond of commitment helped to weather pending storms.
At twenty-eight, Philip worked for the US Embassy in Freetown as personnel officer earning a lucrative salary. Sabina was now a bank manager at Sierra Leone Commercial Bank. Blending their income placed them in the middle-class bracket. After dating for several years and getting to know each other very well, it was time to move their relationship to a higher level. While planning an engagement ceremony, they concealed the premature arrangements. Philip bought an engagement ring from an expensive jeweler in Paris. One of Sabina’s clients also donated an engagement ring.
After settling for an agreement to get married, they chose to hide the news from Philip’s parents, who were still skeptical of Sabina. It was joyful tidings to Sabina’s mother, who wanted a better and happier life for her daughter; she never had one herself.
“Will you be happy spending your life with Philip? Marriage is a lifetime commitment, according to our culture. It is a lasting union between two families,” Ajuah cautioned her daughter.
Unlike Sabina, Philip was hesitant to break the tidings to his parents, who might pose questions about Sabina’s family, but he found the courage to speak his mind. The news was not well-received. Rigorous scrutiny of her ancestral roots ensued. After painstaking investigations, dirty linens in her family surfaced. A scandal emerged about Justice Ben-Strong, Sabina’s uncle, who had committed suicide following an embezzlement charge. Furthermore, her father was not a Creole, as Philip’s family had thought. He was an adopted child bearing an adopted name. Truly, he was “Marabou,” a generic term for a Muslim, emerging from Fourah Bay commonly known as “Oku Creole.” His actual last name being Deensie-Cole disqualified his daughter.
Muslims have never been married into Philip’s family. The Coker-Davies with their double barrel name would not marry anyone from a different background. Family disparity was enough to throw the proposal out of balance. Philip knew his family was biased. He advocated that Sabina is a well-mannered, decent, and educated woman.
Coldly and craftily, his father said, “If that is the woman you want, go ahead and marry her.”
Philip, seeming resolute, listened to his parents carefully because he wanted an amicable resolution of their differences.
The date of the engagement was set to take place in Sabina’s house at 8.30 p.m. Preparations for the event intensified as uncles, aunts, cousins, nephews, and nieces were all invited from both sides. Colorful African costumes were ordered and tailored for the occasion. The women prepared “ashorbie” -- identically crafted dresses.
Two weeks before the event, Sabina’s mother won the lottery. “Sabina! Look! Ah win lotto,” she screamed.
Ajuah decided to prove that she was no longer a peasant. Her house could be renovated for a perfect, joyous occasion. She could also afford assorted and expensive food with a variety of drinks. Her entire living room would receive a makeover and new carpet installed. She also purchased a new generator, to redeem the chronic darkness, since they never had electricity.
No doubt, the wedding expenses were huge on the groom’s side, but divine providence had swept Ajuah off her feet two weeks before the engagement. "Sabina! Look me money we set,” she said happily. Now, she could live well unlike the peasant she had been all her life. She was armed with unexpected wealth and could now show off. Quickly, juicy gossip began to spread among folks, who did not know about her lottery fortune. Now she could renovate her house for the special occasion. She began to stock assorted beverages: expensive European wine, strong liquor, and crates of soft drinks. Her living room was decorated with scion-crafted Arabian carpet. One could hear the monotonous noise from the newly owned double-piston generator, located behind the house to prevent blackouts.
At 8.25 p.m., the doors were shut, according to the Creole customs and traditions. Around 8.30 p.m., there was a loud knock at the door.
No one answered.
On the second knock, a bold male voice dramatically asked: “Who is that knocking on my door?” This was the host’s spokesperson.
“We are the Coker-Davies family,” a male voice outside answered.
“What do you want at night?” the host spokesman questioned with an unpleasant tenor tone.
“We are seeking a rose,” the voice outside replied.
“Do you know the time right now… a perfect stranger asking to pluck our rose at night? Sorry, I can’t help you,” the host spokesman responded.
After the exchange, the host spokesman agreed to open the door. The visitors explained their mission after exchanging greetings. The host spokesman made jokes to make them feel comfortable. Both families familiarized themselves through introductions and by engaging conversations according to the culture. The occasion moved to its next phase. The visiting family revealed their admiration for a beautiful rose in their garden, and they would like to heed the tradition of engagement followed by marriage. They needed the blessing of Sabina’s parents to ensure that the union would be lifetime bliss. Marrying someone’s daughter/son is a privilege that demanded mutual honor and respect. Africans look forward to this joyous and sacred, once-in-a-lifetime experience.
Immediately, a pageant of young ladies paraded in front of the visiting family so they could choose the rose among them who would emerge the bride. After many rejections, the correct rose finally emerged. The ceremony reached its crescendo with the exchange of gifts and giving of the ring. Singing, prayers, and dance celebrations attuned to beating of drums and African music followed. Jubilant applause and head-nodding signaled the approval of the ring.
In an atmosphere of admiration, the ring was placed on Sabina’s finger. She went around the house showing each guest her glittering diamond ring. At this stage, each family member began to embrace each other. They shared jokes and set a date for the marriage, scheduled three months from the engagement day. Responsibilities were delegated to each family member, starting with the church service to the reception party. Even though there were petty squabbles, attention was focused on a successful marriage and reception.
To Sabina’s excitement, her gorgeous wedding dress had just arrived. Once she tried it on, she found it was too small. She loved it so much that she was determined not to return it for another one. She began a diet and exercise regiment. When she ordered the dress, a fantasy image of a slim tall woman dominated her mind, not her real self.
Before the eve of the marriage, things started out well. The wedding train was equipped and ready for the auspicious day. It was necessary to commune with the spirits of the ancestors to solicit their blessing. Ajuah and the elders visited the cemetery to talk to the dead. She provided kolanuts and favorite alcoholic beverages to commune with them while pouring libation. The group prayed and asked in turns that the ancestor spirits would guide and favor the occasion.
When the kolanuts were tossed up in the air by the graveside, the dead did not give their approval. The ceremony was repeated several times, but the results were the same. They believed that the dead could be sleeping or away and should not be bothered. Many people remained optimistic while seeking the approval of the dead.
Sabina’s family slaughtered two cows and five sheep for the celebration. Ajuah secured the services of experienced cooks to prepare many sumptuous meals. Neighbors could tell that the celebration would be a great success. Many of them were invited, and several crashed. Strangers entered the compound and shared in the merrymaking. Regent village “Hunting Society” sounded their horns, blasting their enchanting drums with energy and with an infectious rhythm. The village was on fire.
At the same time, Doctor Olor’s gumbay music(3) was playing many favorite tunes, amid dancing and spirited singing. “Yawo Mammy heavy so...yawo nor dae ya…eeee…dae.” (4) A dance band attended, playing popular syncopated music that drew a mammoth crowd.
The village had never seen such an elaborate celebration in a lifetime. Aroma from the various foods that were being prepared triggered salivation from many hopeful mouths. Neighbors stole uncooked food from the abundant provision. Others volunteered to prepare African dishes in addition to the catered food. News quickly spread around town that the marriage of the year train has left the station.
According to the Creole tradition, on the eve of a wedding, the bride or groom cannot visit one another. Soon, Philip began to nurse a strong feeling of doubt. The words of caution from his parents about the compatibility of the two families had grown wild roots in his mind. He was now at war with himself. He loved Sabina dearly and also cherished his relationship with his folks. He was not willing to ruin the strong bond with his parents. Since he lost his peace unconsciously, his warm personality began to take a toll.
He came into the church thirty minutes late for the wedding rehearsals. His tardiness at this important event created anxiety among the organizers. When he showed up, folks could tell from his countenance that something unusual was brewing.
“What is the matter, Philip?” Ajuah asked him.
“Nothing, Ma!” he replied sharply unlike his usual romantic tone.
His demeanor was different. He tried to conceal his negative emotion, which had a sharp contrast with his natural vivacious, engaging personality. Many associated it with overwhelmed anxiety and the stress of getting married. It grew more serious than many thought.
“Phil, please honey, tell me what is wrong with you?” Sabina asked while speaking privately with Philip.
“Nothing is wrong honey,” he replied deceitfully.
The look on his face as he spoke sent sudden chills down Sabina’s spine. His reassuring words, compounded with a warm kiss, easily sealed Sabina’s confidence that he cared and adored her. They laughed heartily and departed to their separate festive homes.
After the bachelor-eve event, Philip went to bed with a heavy heart. He was actively toiling over his parents’ passionate red flag. How can I resolve this issue? he thought. They have always supported him on every thing he chose to undertake. But marriage is a lifetime bond, he told himself. What if Sabina turns out otherwise? he pondered. I can't take a risk; this is too hard for me. His family had protected their reputation. Why should I taint it? He had no better option as time was running out. A voice whispered within asking him to stay away from the ceremony. This idea dominated his mind, but it was not his innate wish to betray either Sabina or his parents.
At 6.00 a.m., while the family slept, Philip woke up with a confused mind and disappeared. He wandered around like a missing puppy that carried a heavy burden on its mind. Aimlessly, he boarded a vehicle to Waterloo village. No one knew about his trip. People thought he was still around, but no one had observed him taking a bath or eating breakfast, as he would usually do before going out early. Cautiously, he left the house secretly, since movements in the house could easily have raised suspicion. His folks might have questioned him or even offered to come with him. His secret was deep-rooted, and time was sensitive. While in a vehicle, his thought was glued on the wedding. How horrible it would be to boycott my own wedding?
At 11 a.m., guests would be busy preparing for the ceremony. He made sure no one was trailing him. The wedding scheduled for 1.00 p.m. was only two hours away.
His family grew anxious about his welfare. Time was ticking fast. At twelve noon, it dawned that something must be wrong. Sabina was at her house, busy dressing up with all the elaborate glamour a bride craves for her wedding. She had no clue about the developments:, while Philip’s parents were wearily searching for him. It soon became impossible to suppress the news of his disappearance. The news spread as quickly as it broke out.
When Sabina heard that he was missing, she shouted, “Lord, have mercy oh! Fire! Fire oh!” She rolled on the floor trying to strangle herself with her veil. She actually passed out when she realized that the love of her life had mysteriously disappeared without giving her any explanation. The shock could have triggered a cardiac arrest. The shame and pain became cruel and massive.
At 12.30 p.m., when the groom and best man should have been seated in the church, Philip was still at large. His disappearance was a nightmare.
Philip ran from place to place, without any known destination. As he looked at his watch he realized he had inflicted shame and pain especially on Sabina. He began to sob and shed tears. How could I do this to Sabina I love so much? He remembered the Late Justice Ben-Strong, who had committed suicide because he could not handle a scandal. He was certain never to take that route. He had had nothing to eat since he left that morning, and he was still not feeling hungry. He lost appetite for food or anything that could bring him pleasure. Though he did not disobey his parents, he obviously had inflicted an abiding stigma on his family. A family that was very jealous and meticulous about their inherited reputation. Their esteemed status was paramount to them, and they were not prepared to compromise it.
Anxiously, the pastor had waited at the church until 1.30 p.m. before he announced that the ceremony was indefinitely postponed. The groom was declared officially missing. The auditorium was overcrowded with a colorful and restless aura. The awful news invited sighing, anger, and rage from guests who were expecting a wonderful event. Sabina’s family vented abuses, while some women shed tears. A bad omen had unfolded. A wedlock deadlock was never anticipated.
Ajuah, consoling her distressed soul, said solemnly, "Wata wae nar for you nor dae run pass you.” (5)
“It was not meant to be,” a dignitary said.
The invited guests lost appetite, and the food was thrown away because it would bring curse on those who consumed such sumptuous meals. Many people believed that consuming the food would bring them bad luck. Gossips about Sabina’s disappointment saturated the township. The Coker-Davies’ name was viciously dragged through the mud.
“How could this aristocrat inflict such a terrible pain on a pleasant lady?” an old woman ragged.
Sabina was hospitalized for an extreme case of depression and nervous breakdown. Slowly, she regained consciousness. While her vital signs improved, her emotional and psychological health suffered a major assault. Treatment and healing could last a lifetime.
Later, she was discharged and sent home. Barely conscious, she saw her mother and in-laws by her side with tense and anxious faces. Their hands glued to their chins, no one dared to break the silence. Sabina read their faces and their hearts. All she said while beating her breast was, “My wedlock deadlock.” She got off her bed and was ready to face the world with a brand new education. Philip was still on the run. How could he run from my past while the present haunted him? Whenever Philip decided to show up to set the records straight, she would welcome his explanation.
The story made front-page headlines in most newspapers. One could hear the newspaper boy’s outburst at a distance. “Daily Mail: Orkor runaway -- Wedlock deadlock! Bridegroom, Philip Coker-Davies ran away on his own wedding day. Daily Mail: buy one get, one free!”
Neighbors were peeping from half-cracked windows and half-drawn curtains when they heard the bombshell. The vendor repeated the headlines aloud as he slowly passed Sabina’s family house. He was easily visible with a variety of stacked newspapers in his grip. Sabina could hear from her room where she was resting in isolation, but she showed no reaction that would further assault her distressed and broken heart.
Roland Bankole Marke © 2007
Roland B. Marke is the author of three books: Teardrops Keep Falling, Minuteman Press, 2003; Silver Rain and Blizzard, Publish America, 2005; and Harvest of Hate, 2006. His work has appeared in several publications including the World Press, Free Press, Florida Times Union, Jacksonville Advocate, and Mabayla Review. He is a Sierra Leonean poet and freelance writer living in Florida.
Contact: Email: bankole@mindspring.com Website: www.Rolandmarke.com
End Notes: Krio (1) Local transportation (2) Mom, baskets take extra space (3) Sierra Leonean music by Dr. Olor (4) Bride's mom praised for her good upbringing (5) What is destined cannot be altered. See also: Roland Bankole Marke: Sierra Leona - My First Love and other poems & Twilight: The tree of life
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